I ate too many cookies and I'm crying. Those are unrelated events, really, outside of their shared relationship with me. This isn't about cookies, anyway, which, in fairness, were delicious, I just shouldn't have eaten so many.
I'm crying because I just watched the finale of The Office. I can be overly sentimental
about such matters, but this touches me a little more deeply than usual. It's a
good show, but I wouldn't say it's my favorite. It is, however, somewhat
perfectly what it is, though, silly stories about finding joy and humor and
love in ordinary things. It's a show that I've watched from the beginning, too,
so I'm a little more invested in it. Watching something run its course from
start to end has a certain significance, at least for me.
I liked how they wrapped it up. It was well done and
satisfying, a fitting farewell. There was an appropriate amount of closure
without being overly indulgent. There's still the sense that the characters
live on in some reality, but that they've moved on with their lives and this
chapter that's been shared with us is over. It helped that the characters
acknowledged this in a very natural way. It was time.
What really strikes a chord with me, and it happens with
other things, too, is that I have so little going on in my life that I can (and
do) put myself in the world of a TV show. It's a real part of my life, in this
case, half an hour at a time over 8 years, 9 seasons, and 201 episodes, every
single one of which I've experienced. I felt a part of something, uncommon for
me in real life, but now it's over and I'm sad. I'm sad that I won't have this
specific distraction from my life, something that made me smile and laugh and
feel a little. I'm sad that I have such a void that's so easily filled by a television
show. I'm sad that I don't feel good at all while writing this, times like
these a big reason why TV has become so important to me. I'm sad because it's
not likely to change anytime soon, and now I'm short a proven escape.
I wish my relationships with people were as strong and as trustworthy
and as reliable, but, well, they're not, by and large. The more I think about
it, the more similarities I see, though, with most of the attachment and
significance being on my end. At least with television, it's more of a
given--there aren't the same expectations of reciprocation. People are so much
more disappointing that way.
So I'm sad...and I cried...over a TV show. At least there
was a sort of good-bye and a bit of closure in that sense. Plus, I can watch
the re-runs anytime I want. You can't do that with people, and if you could,
why wouldn't you just make new memories instead?
If you're reading this and if you know and care about me at
all, let's make some new memories. Not everything has to be some blockbuster
episode, just a normal day at The Office,
if you will, would be more than fine for me. I'm rarely busy, so most any
time slot that works for you will probably work for me--just don't pre-empt me,
please. I'd appreciate it if you don't post-empt me, either (whatever that
means). And if you've stumbled upon this somehow and don't know me from an
extra in the show, go make new memories with people important to you. As much
as I enjoy TV, I'd be much happier if I didn't have time to watch it.
Auditions for co-stars in life are open, name your place and
time.
