Almost fell out of my chair...

I've felt pretty crappy today. It's a little surprising considering how well I slept. They tore down a wall downstairs and I was none the wiser until I got up. I originally awoke at 4PM, just to take my medicine, but I ended up staying up after I sat down and started checking email, Facebook, and Twitter. Once I was up, I went ahead and browsed the rest of my usual websites (sports, entertainment, tech stuff, etc.) and chatted a bit. I'd finished my routine and was messing around on IM when it happened. I had just started to reply to my friend when I started drifting uncontrollably to my right. I somehow finished my response--my fingers going on autopilot--and I'm really not sure how I didn't completely fall over. I dozed off for a split second.

This has happened before. I fall down now and then, my legs (along with the rest of my body) going limp like I got hit on the chin, but usually recovering shortly after hitting the floor. I've caught myself a lot, too, grabbing onto chairs, tables, counter tops, and walls before I completely lost my way. Luckily, I've never hurt myself nor have I ever completely gone unconscious, but I've closed my eyes for a second or two and had no control over my body several times.

I think it may have to do with the new headache medicine on this occasion. It makes me feel weird. I'm supposed to take it twice a day, but I'd only been taking it once because of the stomach issues. I think I solved those problems by drinking more water with it, so, last night, I went ahead and took the second dose. Perhaps that's why I slept so soundly (and dreamed such weird dreams, too...that my brother and I were little, and somehow were on Mars where they'd terraformed a colony and all kinds of other weirdness). The falling over incident happened almost 12 hours after taking the medicine, though, and 9 of those hours I was in bed. I'm thinking I might be better off just dealing with the headaches with some Tylenol.

Today was weird. There wasn't really any warning that it was coming on. I'm usually more lightheaded than dizzy, though I feel elements of both and am fairly used to them, but when I start feeling worse, I tend to get dizzier. Today felt more like anesthesia was kicking in, but I wasn't counting backwards from 100. It was rather scary. After I collected myself, I went back to bed for a couple of hours. I mainly got up just so I wouldn't sleep until midnight and completely mess up my sleep schedule, especially since I have plans for Saturday...

On a better note, I found someone to catch the UFC with Saturday night. Hopefully I don't pass out...my original intent with that was to be funny, but now that I think about it a little, it's a legitimate concern...argh... As long as I'm conscious, it'll be a good time. I'm looking forward to the fights, plus getting out of the house with a friend is always good. We'll be at Buffalo Wings and Rings downtown, next to Steak 'n Shake on Maryland St., if you want to hang out. I guess we'll be there if you don't want to hang out, too, but then that info means less ;).

It's so frustrating having so little say in what I can and can't do. I'm very tired of having so many limitations. It's been about half my life, now, that I've had to accommodate my eyes, and the last 7 years of being constantly woozy. It's hard enough navigating through life being poor and broke and shy and self-conscious about being poor and broke and shy. I'm not so shy now, and less self-conscious, but I'm still held back. At least before, it was more on me and I just had to change my thinking and dive in. Now I'm often too sick to make it to the pool, and even when I'm able to get there, I still have to worry about it kicking in and drowning. *SIGH*

Here's hoping for a better tomorrow for us all :)!

-B

P.S.
Don't forget the Fever on Sunday night, 8PM tipoff, at Conseco Fieldhouse! Let's pack the joint and cheer the ladies onto victory and a tie in the series! http://www.wnba.com/fever

Blah

Today was so-so. The Fever lost at New York. It was close, then they pulled away at the end when we played horribly and they played well. It's a must win for the gals on Sunday night, then (for tickets, go to http://www.feverbasketball.com/ !!!!!). The Colts got shellacked by the Packers, though the starting offense looked good. The D still needs to tackle better, though Bob Sanders was lighting dudes up. Painter looked decent, so hopefully people will cut him a little slack now. A few guys got hurt, hopefully not too badly.

It was nice to have had both the Fever and the Colts to watch tonight. Taking in the games and having a rooting interest in them helped to break up the monotony of just sitting here. I caught the Fever game online on my PC and the Colts on TV. Looking back and forth between the two is probably why I'm so woozy now...blah. I have some Bellator fights to watch later, too. I don't think I'm very familiar with any of the fighters on the card, but a good scrap is a good scrap, and hopefully there are some exciting bouts on there.

Unless some other people get back to me, it's looking like I won't be able to catch the UFC live on Saturday. My buddy who usually goes with me had his plans change, and no one else has responded either way. I sent out a few messages on Facebook, but, of course, no one's replied to any of those...again. If you can't or don't want to go, that's cool, but letting me know for sure and not just expecting me to assume so would be nice and much appreciated. It's going to be extra hard to stay away from the results while I wait to find an alternative way to watch, too. Oh well. If you'd like to go with me to watch the fights, PLEASE let me know ASAP, thanks.

Well, there's today's edition. All the best to you and yours :).

-B

Made some calls...

Today was OK, I suppose. I got some stuff done, mainly calling in for med refills and worked on getting a couple of appointments together (more on that another time, but nothing to worry about). It's better than having not been productive at all, but it doesn't feel like the 'win' that it should. Enh.

Last night/this morning was kinda weird ("was" instead of "were" as I'm lumping them together as one). I wasn't terribly tired, but mainly just didn't want to go to bed, so I ended up staying up until noon or so. Part of it was that I waited too long to shower, so I had to put it on hold until after my parents were out of the bathroom. I was too woozy to bathe the night before, so I was more intent on cleaning up this morning. And it's not that I was terribly dirty, either, but I enjoy showering and don't like having any unnecessary funk on me, especially before going to bed. I really don't like going to bed dirty. Then, since I knew I'd be up, I figured I may as well make those calls.

I'm surprised I'm not more tired considering I didn't sleep much or very well. I mostly left messages when I called in the morning, and they kept calling me back. It's rare that I get such timely replies, and while I appreciate the quick responses, I wouldn't have minded them answering tomorrow after having let me sleep today. But it all worked out. I got most of the stuff squared away, and I'm not too much worse for the wear.

I'm really starting to enjoy this blogging stuff. At first--and I know I'm still just getting started, but--I had to make myself take the time to do it. It was a little more of a chore. I still have to fight through how I'm feeling, but it's becoming more a matter of simply reminding myself to write instead of forcing myself to get it done. Looking at the tracking statistics from Google Analytics (which I set up because I knew you lazy buggers wouldn't comment all the time :D), it was encouraging to see that people were checking this out more and more each day. Then I saw how the numbers were a bit skewed because they also incorporated my views, including my previews of in-progess blogs, which wasn't immediately clear. Even without my page hits, it seems to be catching on a little. I would definitely like to see it become more popular, though.

I do realize that a lot of what I write about isn't all that interesting (believe me, I know--I'm living it) and that everyone is busy with this and that. I do hope to talk more about specific topics more often, like MMA yesterday...maybe about some current events, poems or songs, perhaps some technical stuff...whatever. Your suggestions (again, not stupid ones, though...lol...I know it's silly, but it cracks me up every time I do that :P) would really help with and would be greatly appreciated. I want this to be interactive and not just me talking about how boring my day was. Ask me questions--I can't think of anything I won't answer...or am I that uninteresting? I'm sure my situation makes me seem less compelling, but there's a lot to me that people don't realize, and I am much more than my circumstances allow me to actively show on a regular basis.

Once again, please let me know that you've read this in whatever manner you find easiest, and doing so anonymously is A-OK. Feedback/suggestions/commentary are encouraged, too. Thanks for reading, thanks to those who do respond, and have an awesome day :)!

-B

P.S.
It's looking like the UFC PPV watch is on for Saturday, let me know if you're interested. It'll be a good time.

MMA

There is a UFC card this Saturday night, 9PM for the prelims on Spike TV, then 10PM to 1AM for the Pay Per View. The best place I've seen them, and where I'd like to go again (though I'm cool with wherever) is Buffalo Wings and Rings, downtown, next to Steak 'n Shake (111W. Maryland St.). There are TVs everywhere and you can hear pretty well, too. I can't go alone, but if people can meet me, I'll be there by 8:30PM.

MMA is now my 2nd favorite sport behind football (basketball is now 3rd). Much to my surprise, it's a fairly close 2nd, too. It's pretty amazing because I LOVE football. Football and MMA overlap in many areas with the physicality and brutality and violence, but also with the need for game planning and precision. While I am a fan of the (controlled) violence of MMA (and football, too), I admire more the technique and skill and strategy. I can't stand when people start to boo when fighters are on the ground or aren't engaging "enough" on the feet. 99.99999% of the people booing would have NO CHANCE at all of doing any significant damage to a trained, professional fighter who is literally risking his health and life, in part, to entertain the crowd.

A submission is just as beautiful and dangerous as a standing knockout. The intricacies of the positions and the setups to get to a hold are fascinating. Submissions are more impressive to me because they're harder to do. If anyone gets hit hard enough on the chin, he will go to sleep. But to put someone in a position where he is forced to tap out and quit rather than lose consciousness from a choke or break a limb/ligament/tendon from a joint lock--to make someone say, "I quit," or better put, "I QUIT! LET ME GO!"--is more poignant than a hitting someone in the head (or sometimes the body) for a knockout. That's not to say that I don't appreciate good striking, either. Joe Rogan, hilarious comedian and UFC color commentator, described (UFC Middleweight Champion) Anderson Silva's fighting style as a "ballet of violence" and I couldn't agree more. A good brawl is fun to watch now and then, but someone with such superior skills, on the feet or on the ground, can just be mesmerizing.

The best way I know how to describe MMA is to think of what pro wrestling would be if it were real, but with practical (mostly) rules. I'm not a big fan of Wikipedia, but their article on MMA is pretty good. Check it out for the history and evolution of the sport: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mixed_martial_arts. Here are the rules in North America: http://www.abcboxing.com/unified_mma_rules.html. The rules are different in Japan and in other places around the world, though. For instance, you can kick and knee a grounded opponent in the head there in some promotions. And some North American leagues limit the rules by disallowing elbows to the head on the ground.

Like a lot of people, for a long time I thought that MMA and the UFC were just glorified Tough Man contests and I had no interest in them. Then I stumbled upon the UFC reality show, The Ultimate Fighter. I used to watch WWE pro wrestling, and the first season of TUF aired right after WWE's Monday Night Raw. I just happened not to change the channel after wrestling. TUF is basically a tournament of up and coming fighters, divided into 2 teams coached by established fighters. The up-and-comers are all sequestered in a house in Las Vegas with no access to the outside world for 6 weeks. They train and go back to the house (and usually drink and get on each others' nerves). The show leads up to a pay per view headlined by the 2 coaches squaring off. Watching TUF showed me that the fighters were real athletes with real skill who trained very hard. They weren't just thugs and rednecks who liked to fight, but usually educated guys who loved competition. You still have your occasional thug fighter, but he'd better have skills or he'll be a knocked out/choked out/tapped out thug who isn't as tough as he thought.

The UFC is the biggest and best MMA promotion around. In the U.S., you also have Strikeforce and Bellator as major companies, plus hundreds of smaller, local shows. I include the WEC with the UFC since they're both owned by the same people. The WEC just has lighter weight classes as the only main difference between it and the UFC. Japan has 2 major promotions, Dream and Sengoku, but they're still behind the UFC. I enjoy fights from any promotion--a good fight is a good fight--but the UFC has most of the best fighters and I think they put on the best show. They're also the most accessible to me.

MMA is still evolving. It used to be that a wrestler or a jiu jitsu guy or a kickboxer would learn just enough of the other disciplines to defend them, but stuck with the style that made them world class athletes. Now, everyone has to train everything. You may have started out as a wrestler or a striker or a submission guy (or gal), but if you're not well-rounded, you're not going to fare well against high level competition. Now you see wrestlers and submission specialists knocking people out and strikers tapping out their opponents. You have to be able to capitalize on any weakness, any opening, no matter your background, and it's happening more and more. There are kids now growing up studying MMA and not just wrestling or jiu jitsu or taekwondo or karate. A few young fighters out there now started that way. I can't wait to see how skilled the next generation of fighters will be, especially when you see more athletes turning to MMA instead of more traditional stick and ball sports.

As the combatants' skills continue to advance, it becomes more and more important for the sport to progress with them. Fighter safety is the most important issue in MMA. There need to be more competent referees. Too often a fighter takes excessive damage. Too often a fighter loses dominant position because the ref didn't understand what was going on. Too many mistakes are being made by someone who is directly responsible for the safety of the fighters. There are problems with judging, as well. Not enough judges know exactly what they are watching and don't credit fighters for effectively using techniques that they don't recognize. Scoring a close round one way or the other is understandable, but not scoring the fight right because you didn't know how dangerous a submission hold was is unforgivable. Most fighters get paid a certain amount just for fighting, their "show money," and then a win bonus. Judges are taking money out of fighters' pockets.

I'm a huge fan despite the issues I have with MMA. You have the incompetent officiating and judging. I don't like all of the rules--I think you should be able to knee a grounded opponent in the head, and maybe kick him, too, and elbows should always be allowed, among other things. Most promotions won't work with each other and co-promote, so there are some very interesting fights that we may never see. I'd like there to be more MMA on free TV. All main event fights should be 5 rounds, even if a title isn't involved. Even with my objections, MMA is still one of the purest forms of competition. Track and field and swimming are pure, as well--running/swimming faster, jumping higher/farther, throwing something farther--but MMA has the element of direct contact and physicality, too. It can answer the question: Who's tougher?

Another part of MMA that I love is the respect that the fighters have for each other. They can talk all the trash they want leading up to a fight, but once it's over, they usually hug each other (or at least shake hands) and thank their opponent for the experience. I've not been in many fights in my life, but I've hit and been hit a few times, and there's something about the bond that comes out of that. While it's certainly different in many respects on the street than it is in competition, there's still this link with another person that you can only get by fighting him. To see 2 highly skilled, well trained athletes try to hurt each other for 15 or 25 minutes, risking their own safety in the process, embrace and smile afterward is amazing and enlightening. It's sport, it's competition, it's pure.

If/when I get to feeling better and am physically able, I'd like to fight once. I want to test myself. Of course I'd have to train first, and I have a lot to learn. I know that recognizing what pro fighters are doing and being able to do it myself are not the same thing, but I was a good athlete and I'm as tough as they come. No man could put me through worse than I've already dealt with. I'd love to see how I stack up, how well I could compete.

I get that MMA isn't for everyone, too. I can see how it would be hard for some people to watch people hurt each other, even in the context of sport. That's all fine. What I don't like is people who bash it without knowing what it is, what is involved, and without having seen it done well. If you don't like violence or physicality, don't watch football, either. I've played football, and it is indeed violent.I have the scars to prove it. The injury rate for football players is 100%, and that's not rounding up. If MMA isn't your thing, that's cool. I'm not into bungee jumping, but I have no beef with those who are. I'll just choose to stay away from bungee jumping ;).

Thanks for reading, especially if you're not an MMA fan. Hopefully this little blurb gets you closer to at least respecting the sport that I'm loving more and more. Comments and feedback are, as always, welcomed and encouraged. Acknowledgement that you read this is very much appreciated, too. Take care, and COME WATCH THE FIGHTS WITH ME THIS WEEKEND! :)

-B

Back on that medicine...:/

Today = enh. As I mentioned last time, I napped from 1-7AM....then was back in bed between 1PM and 8PM. The alarm was snoozed more than a handful of times. I don't really remember what I did between the nap and getting back up besides watching a little TV (True Blood and....something else) and messing around online. Oh, I did shower and IM a bit, but not at the same time, of course ;). After I got back up, I just did more web surfing and TV, plus heated up some food. Today was not very productive.

My doc's nurse called me back about that medicine. Apparently it's the only one that'll help with my kind of headaches, which is a little hard to believe since I took something different in past that worked. Whatever. I'll just make sure to eat more with it, and I probably won't take it twice a day like I'm supposed to. I'd rather my head hurt than have the stomach (and lower) issues. Too, it makes me a bit extra dizzy and tired, and I'm not digging that at all, either. Oh well, what's one more thing...?

I was really hoping to get into something deeper this time, or talk about something more deeply, anyway. But, of course, I'm not in the best state, physically or mentally, to do that. I'm not sure I'd express myself very well, and if I can't say what I mean, then I probably shouldn't say anything. I get misunderstood enough when I'm of (relatively) sound mind.

That's it for this time, I guess. I do hope to have something more interesting tomorrow. As always, suggestions are welcome, as long as they're not stupid :P. Feedback and acknowledgement are much appreciated, too. Thanks for reading and a special thanks to everyone who's commented so far :)!

-B

Good times...

Yesterday was good. I have to use "yesterday" instead of "today" because I crashed and took a 6 hour nap from 1AM to 7AM...lol ;) I slept well Saturday night (well, Sunday morning), but not enough, and all the festivities of the weekend caught up with me. I don't mind, though; it's a nice change to be tired from actual activity. My brother, a friend (same from Saturday night), and I went to the Fever game. It was a good time as it always is. We ended up losing, blowing a lead with some poor play and much poorer officiating. The loss ended up not affecting our playoff seeding as the other teams we were fighting with won. It would have been nice to go into the playoffs with a little momentum, but maybe losing like that will light a fire.

After the game, my friend stayed and hung out for a bit. It was cool just talking. It was also the longest I've shared my little world with anyone, meaning my closet of a room with barely enough space to move around. She got to see where, and a little of how, I spend most of my time, which is sitting right here in front of my computer. Obviously, I was more engaged having company over, but it was nice to be able to show that to someone else somewhat first hand. I don't know how many people believe or can imagine how dull or boring or just how simple and plain things are for me. Too, as much as I enjoy keeping up with people online, it was very refreshing to have someone there face to face. I could use a lot more of that.

By the way, the Fever are the 3rd seed and play New York in the first round of the WNBA playoffs. Game 1 is at NY on Thursday (probably on ESPN2) and then back here at Conseco Fieldhouse on Sunday night. Tickets start at $11 and I'm sure there will be some different deals/promotions with tickets. Come support the Fever as we make another run at a championship! The ladies are all great and deserve it! Plus, it's a good time, fun for all :). http://www.feverbasketball.com/

All in all, despite an ailing back (that's feeling better, but still has some room to improve), not so pleasant side effects from medicine (still working on an alternative), and a Fever losing streak, it's been a good week. I met a few cool people, got a few things done, got out of the house twice, and started up this blog. Hopefully I can be more productive this week (which would have the added bonus of me feeling good enough to get more done).

Thanks for reading and I hope things are going well for you. With your help, I'm doing better, and I hope you know that I'm always here for you, too. :)

-B

Got out of the house!

Today was pretty good. I didn't sleep great again, though better than the previous few nights, but my back isn't bothering me as much, so a net win. I've been a bit tired since I've been up, partially from bad sleep, some from medicine, I think, but nothing terrible. A friend I met online the other day picked me up and we went to Jillian's and played pool. It was really cool getting to know her a little better, and it's always great to get out of the house. Neither of us is very good, but I won most of the games. I used to be a lot better (never great, but much better), but I've not played in forever and the huge table got to me some, too, since I'm more habituated to playing on smaller ones. I had my moments, though, however fleeting they were...lol

There were some more fights tonight, Strikeforce, the second biggest promotion (behind the UFC) in America, but on Showtime, which I don't get at home, plus I was out. I caught up on them, let's say with the help of friends :D...and now I'm waiting for post-fight interviews to be posted. The fights that I saw were entertaining, but the referees were HORRIBLE. Officiating and judging are the biggest issue with the sport of MMA, and something needs to be done about it. I'll get into it all in more depth later, hopefully soon, when I dedicate an entire post to MMA.

Today (Sunday) is the last regular season home game for the Fever. The Fever are essentially in 3rd place going in (after tie-breakers). We (yes, we--I've had tickets since I've been home from school in 2002 and I care that much) need to win as well as having Washington and/or New York lose to improve our playoff seed. We all have the same record. My brother will finally be able to go to a game again. He goes with me to most of them, but he works late on Friday nights and has missed the last couple home games because of it. He'll be extra-excited. I'm also bringing the friend that I hung out with tonight, which will be nice. It'll be her first time, but surely not her last ;). It'll be a good time, for sure, especially after a win. They have ticket specials, so come hang out and cheer on the Fever if you're not busy. The game starts at 5PM, so you'll get home in plenty of time for the kids to get to bed for school on Monday. Get them up early to do their homework if need be! :)
http://www.feverbasketball.com/

Happy Sunday (or whatever day you're reading this on) and GO FEVER!!!!
-B

P.S.
As of now, I'm refraining from referring to people by name, out of respect to their privacy, mainly, but that may change in the future (after checking with the interested parties first, of course). Let me know if you have any preference either way and I'll keep that in mind.

P.P.S.
I'm still open to suggestions for how to deal with my card collection, any help would be greatly appreciated.

P.P.P.S.
Please let me know in whatever way you're most comfortable that you've checked this out. As long as people are reading, I'll keep posting. Thanks :)!

P.P.P.P.S.
Have a super day/night/dusk/dawn :)!