(from February 21, 2012)
Please stop referring to us all as "Bigfoot." There are many of us, and we don't all have the same name. In fact, not even one of us has ever been christened "Bigfoot"--ever. The closest anyone has come is "Biigflut," but his parents were hippies and the name doesn't mean anything in particular. Also, apparently whomever's tracks you're basing the "Bigfoot" moniker on is somewhat of an anomaly. Most of us have reasonably sized feet.
Too, with the today's technology, can't anyone film us in high definition? All of these grainy, blurry, low quality videos are just insulting. 1) Such camera "techniques" make it far to easy to fake it, and 2) we are much more handsome creatures than we're given credit for. We like to feel sexy, too, so help us Sasquatches out a little, won't ya?
And lastly, please tell the people at Jack Link's Beef Jerky to quit teasing our fellow Sasquatch. It's not funny, and someone always ends up hurt. The particular Sasquatch they keep messing with is a rather sensitive fellow and doesn't deserve such mockery. Financial reparations to pay for his psychological care would be appreciated as a gesture of good faith.
Thank you for your consideration.
Please stop referring to us all as "Bigfoot." There are many of us, and we don't all have the same name. In fact, not even one of us has ever been christened "Bigfoot"--ever. The closest anyone has come is "Biigflut," but his parents were hippies and the name doesn't mean anything in particular. Also, apparently whomever's tracks you're basing the "Bigfoot" moniker on is somewhat of an anomaly. Most of us have reasonably sized feet.
Too, with the today's technology, can't anyone film us in high definition? All of these grainy, blurry, low quality videos are just insulting. 1) Such camera "techniques" make it far to easy to fake it, and 2) we are much more handsome creatures than we're given credit for. We like to feel sexy, too, so help us Sasquatches out a little, won't ya?
And lastly, please tell the people at Jack Link's Beef Jerky to quit teasing our fellow Sasquatch. It's not funny, and someone always ends up hurt. The particular Sasquatch they keep messing with is a rather sensitive fellow and doesn't deserve such mockery. Financial reparations to pay for his psychological care would be appreciated as a gesture of good faith.
Thank you for your consideration.
Addendum: While it's certainly implied, we just wanted to reiterate that we are real.
